you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
