I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize