How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
