butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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