i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I came so hard my ears popped.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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