On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize