Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
