Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
