I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
