We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
