so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize