Pappa wants mamma naked
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
