Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
