You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
We had sex on a dog bed..
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
