Porn is love you can see.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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