You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
