did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
