weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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