You made me cry and you don't even care
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
