Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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