jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
