I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Randomize
