I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
So vagazzling was a success
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
