sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
