I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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