my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
