Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
