butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
