Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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