no you cant smoke seaweed
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
