there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
