Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
