You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
