Heybabeimwearingurpanties
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
