Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
