apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
