Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize