I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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