The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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