She went from zero to smokin in five shots
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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