so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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