that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I got inside last night via doggy door
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
