I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
