why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
