How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I understand Curling. That high.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
