you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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