I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
