So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
He had one of those small greek statue penises
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
