There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
