This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize