In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
